March is the special month set aside to celebrate women globally, even though I believe that women should be celebrated each moment of every passing day. To mark the celebration, I will be identifying, in this article, my multiple identities as a woman, and how these identities make me phenomenal (borrowing the word from Maya Angelou’s poem “Phenomenal Woman”). Just like Angelou’s poem, my essay will also be divided into four parts, with each segment addressing the four distinct qualities that define me as a woman.
Before I proceed, I need to mention that I have learned over time to…
Just as racism is a big deal across the world, in my country (Nigeria), ethnicity is also much of a deal. Although, I will not place the hate that comes with racism on the same level as the ethnic bigotry that is experienced in many parts of Nigeria, specifically when it involves inter-ethnic marriages.
The group that bears the brunt of this ethnic bigotry especially in inter-ethnic marriages is…, yeah! you guessed right, women!.
In many Nigerian cultures, it is generally discouraged for members of a particular ethnic group to marry someone outside that specific ethnic group.
For better context…
“Let me breathe”
A poem on the pain and trauma of unrequited love
I heard you the first time
and the second time
and the third time
I heard you every time
Can you just let me breathe?
You’re strangling me with your words
You’re strangling my body
You’re strangling my mind
You’re strangling my soul
Can you just let me breathe?
I feel the punches and blows
I feel every strike and hit
I just have a request to make.
Just let me breathe.
I’m drowning in your sea of words
I hear all of your catcalls
I have decided to share major parts of my healing process because when I experienced my loss, I hardly found stories of healing by mothers with similar experience. I hope that through this write-up, someone finds succor in my process.
Firstly, I need to mention that I cried as much as I wanted to, I cried when I felt like, I cried anywhere, I just let the tears flow. Having established this, let’s delve into the healing process, at least some of the things that worked for me.
Acceptance: I am one of the “lucky few” that swiftly passed this…
The loss of a child is one of the many wounds that life and time never fully heals…
Prior to my experience I had never heard of (or I had never just paid attention) to terms like “sleeping baby”, “rainbow baby” or you know other similar terms, until I had to deliver my stillborn baby at over forty (40) weeks of pregnancy and boom!, these expressions suddenly appeared in my “personal register”.
To have a stillborn baby is to have a sleeping baby. To have a sleeping baby is to have to endure the pains and pangs of labor knowing…
1.) Writer: Passionate, Creative, Versatile; 2.) Student: Current PhD researcher in Literature; 3.) Human: Woman